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Sacred Marriage

What if God designed marriage to make us holy, more than happy?” Written by Gary Thomas

Book Description

In Sacred Marriage, bestselling author Gary Thomas uncovers the ways that your marriage can become a doorway to a closer walk with God and with each other.

Sacred Marriage takes an in-depth look at marriage in the light of it drawing us closer to God through faith.

Thomas says we can use our marriages to grow in faith when the norm is to use selfish means to pursue happiness in marriage.

The aim of the book is to love God more and love marriage more.

Through scripture, Gary Thomas shows how romantic love is a modern and worldly view - it’s simply not biblical. When we look at examples such as Isaac and Rebekkah, Jacob and Leah, Ruth and Boaz we see that marriage requires deeper levels of understanding that the world does not offer and cannot match.

Thomas speaks of the role of courtship and how infatuation can cause havoc if we don’t understand its purpose. It encourages Christians to find the deeper lessons we are to learn in marriage, through faith.

Thomas compares the rigour of physical training to the challenges we have in marriage. We get a workout either way. But in marriage, Thomas says we can experience a cleansing of the heart, if we approach it through a biblical worldview.

Thomas reminds us that marriage is temporary. The Bible states there is no marriage in heaven. Matthew 22:30 says, For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven. So that brings us back to the question, what is the purpose of marriage?

Ephesians 5:22-33 says that marriage mirrors the relationship Christ has with His church, so marriage, is a pursuit of holiness, through Christ, not happiness.

Instead of looking for God’s love sins points us to worldly love, which pursues happiness with only selfish goals. Instead of pursuing God, sin points us to compete with God through our marriage by expecting or spouse to fulfil us in ways only God can.

Thomas points us to scripture that encourages us to find God in our marriages.

Hosea 2:16-19, Isaiah 62:5, Matthew 9:15, 22:1-14, Revelation 19:7.

Sacred Marriage encourages us to ask ourselves if our marriage is God centred or self centred? How do we know? We can ask: Do our actions mirror God’s Word?

Thomas talks about character issues we face when we are married that we would not encounter otherwise, and when Christian married couples are faced with the threat of divorce, Thomas points to the Word of God that tells us there is one very important reason to stay - marriage represents the relationship between Christ and His church.

Did the book leave me with questions or further reflection?

This book is not a one time read. It needs to be revisited as marriage takes us through one challenge after the other and time and maturity alters the way we react to the content.


Sacred Marriage puts the Word of God and living out the Word in the forefront, challenging us to not only be hearers but doers of the Word of God. As Christ has reconciled us to God the Father, Christian marriages should be all about reconciliation. This we can achieve through the one who created marriage and has the power to sustain it for His purpose.

Sacred Marriage is a wonderful book that every Christian married couple should read. It’s a practical book about marriage, deeply rooted in scripture. It’s also realistic, listing the pitfalls of the sinful world we live in, and all the challenges Christian marriages can encounter.

Most importantly, it points us to the goal of marriage, the precious sacrifice of Christ for His church, which marriage represents, and the faithful promise God has made to not forsake us in our journey here on earth.

Each time our marriages are challenged, remembering that God designed marriage to make us holy, more than happy, will have a huge impact on how we choose to react. Easier said than done I know - but then I think of Zechariah 4:6: This is the word of the LORD to Zerubbabel: ‘Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit,’ Says the LORD of hosts.

I have listened to and am currently revisiting Sacred Marriage on

Thank you for reading this review. Until next time - peace be with you.

NB! The link I list for the book review is not an endorsement of the publisher, bookshop, book club, etc.

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There is Christian media out there that honours the Word of God - you just have to make a determined effort to pick and choose. RFM reviews are based on the films that have focus on the Bible and the Christian values we are supposed to live by, by God's grace.

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Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.
1 Corinthians 6:19-20


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