Me & You, Us, Forever

Written, produced and directed by Dave Christiano. The film is based on a true story.

The plot is as follows:

A love story based in 1974 and 2004. A 47-year-old Christian man, on the other side of an unwanted divorce, reminisces about his old high school girlfriend from 30 years prior.

The Plot

1. Does the plot glorify God?

The plot says the main character is a Christian man, a disciple of Jesus Christ, so yes, it glorifies God.

2. Does the film content glorify God through His Word: Use of Bible verses and adhere to His commandments?

Divorce group leader quoted scripture either in his class or in conversation with the main character, Dave.

• Bitterness troubles us (Hebrews 12:15)

• Thy will be done here on earth, as it is in heaven (Matthew 6:10)

• There is no counsel against the Lord (Proverbs 21:30)

• Faith is what pleases God (Hebrews 11:6)

• Trust what God allows and doesn’t allow (Revelation 3:7)

Promotes God as the only God

• The divorce recovery group leader said: The Lord can heal your hurt.

• Carla, who attended the divorce recovery group meetings, told Dave she prayed to the Lord to consistently get clients.

• The divorce recovery group leader was God-centered in all his conversations.

Promotes being free from idols or refrain from promoting idols

• Dave’s memories and temporary obsession with Mary clouded his faith, turning Mary into an idol. His unhealthy focus on Mary was noticed by his male colleague and friend, as well as Carla and Carla’s colleague and friend.

Honours parents or refrains from promoting dishonour of parents?

• Dave’s daughters treated Dave with respect, even through the stress of the divorce.

Speak against murder or refrain from promoting murder?

• Dave’s sentiment about being borderline wanting to rip someone’s head off (his wife’s). This scene reminded me of Colossians 3:8; "But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. Dave said it in a moment of frustration and it just shows the hurt, and anger that divorce causes and how if we are not focusing on the Lord , the devil can easily tempt us to sin.

Speak against adultery or refrain from promoting adultery?

• Dave’s Christian friend and colleague advised Dave not to go and see his old girlfriend, who he knew was now married. Dave’s obsessive thoughts about his first love, Mary, put adultery in his heart, as she was married. Dave said that he wanted to see Mary alone, just to talk. He made it very clear he didn’t want to run into her husband though. If his thoughts had been pure, he would not have minded meeting Mary while her family was at home. His need for secrecy was

• Dave admitted that one of his imagined scenarios involved Mary being divorced and them getting back together, picking right back up where they left off, thirty years earlier.

• Dave was being so secretive about the whole thing - he knew he was doing something wrong with the mindset of rekindling feelings with Mary.

• Dave calling her Mrs Simmons when he left was a testimony to him understanding he had to obey the Lord’s laws and respect her marriage. His goodbye seemed final. He told Carla it went the way it was supposed to.

• Dave started to listen to a 70s radio station on the way to work instead of the Bible verse channel he listened to every day. This illustration shows his focus started to shift away from the Lord and towards adultery.

Speak against lies or refrain from promoting lies?

• Dave was lying to God and himself (Carla said he wasn’t fooling anyone rationalizing his intentions)

Speak against coveting/jealousy or refrain from promoting jealousy?

• Dave’s obsession with Mary and that everything would be ok if he had married Mary. Dave was coveting Mary through his past (and probably skewed) memories.

• Dave said it was jealousy that hurt his relationship with Mary, even though Mary gave him no reason to be jealous.

Question: What Christian standards does the film convey?

Scripture alone

• Dave asked Carla if there was a biblical reason her husband left - there wasn’t. She asked him the same thing and his answer was the same. Their spouses left them because they had grown tired of them, or in Dave’s case, his wife started an affair with another man.

• The divorce group leader consistently referred to scripture.

Salvation through Christ alone (does not promote good works)

• Dave’s friend, Paul, asked him to tell Mary about Jesus if she wasn’t a Christian.

• Dave said he didn’t think he would have come to Christ if he had stayed in NY.

• Dave witnessed to Mary about him receiving Christ in 1979, after they broke up. He met a girl who was a Christian and she told him about Christ.

• During his visit to Mary, Dave mentioned that he and Mary believed in God, but there was no focus on Jesus Christ. They never talked about spiritual things when they dated. Mary didn’t really react to him telling her this and she had no comment when Dave told her she should look into Jesus Christ, as it was most important. Mary’s last comment to Dave was to tell his parents hello, there was no follow-up about Jesus.

Biblical marriage

• Dave insisted that marriage is supposed to be for life

• Carla said even though she felt she married the wrong person she was determined to stick with her marriage, but her husband was the one who left.

• Dave still had hope for his marriage and was willing to take his wife back even though she had dated someone within the marriage and had done a lot of dating after their separation.

• Carla was tempted to call her high school boyfriend, but knew he was married with a family, so she had full respect for that. Dave on the other hand kept rationalizing his need to see Mary.

• Dave described divorce like a grenade that exploded in the heart.

• The Divorce recovery group at a local church illustrated the pain of divorce. The leader was God-centered and relied on the Bible. He told the guests that Jesus was the only one that could see them through the pain..

• Dave told Mary that he had thought about her over the years. He thought about her every Jan 5th - one “their songs”, he would think of her. The time that they dated were the greatest days of his life - this makes me think that Dave didn’t have a biblical marriage - his mind was still focused on his old love. So it was easy to completely shift focus when his wife left him.

• Dave asked Mary if she had thought about him over the years. Mary said not like him. A song jogs her memory, but that was about it.

• Dave asked his friend, Paul. if he thought about his first love. His friend said he was married and had no reason to think about that - his focus was on his wife.

Husband as the head in his home and the local church

• Dave had prayed for the restoration of his marriage, with his daughters

Recognition of the value of life and blessing in children

• Dave wanted to go back to 1974 and start again with a life with his past girlfriend, but he did not think about the consequences of that path - his daughters would not exist. He had been blessed with two beautiful daughters.

Recognition of the body as the temple of God

• Dave’s ex-wife committed adultery and was promiscuous after their separation..

• Dave would have been willing to go further with his feelings for Mary, but the Lord intervened.

Question: Does the film give glory and honour and thanks to God?

• Carla gave the Lord honour and thanks for her business success

• The leader of the divorce recovery group quoted Proverbs 21:30 : There is no wisdom or understanding or counsel against the Lord. He told Dave that we would end up thanking Jesus if he explained why things turned out the way they did in our lives.

• The leader of the divorce recovery group told Dave to be thankful for the valleys because that’s where the growth happens. This reminds me of 1 Peter 4:12-13 Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. 13 But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed.

Question: Did the film encourage my faith?

• Yes, it encourages me to keep praying for Bible-based (and model by lifestyle) Christian counsel.

• It encourages me to stop asking why and accept what happened and what didn’t. I am reminded of Proverbs 21:30.

• Proverbs 21:30 - I knew the verse but not the reference in the Bible. Now I will remember it, by God’s grace. I have marked it in my Bible

• It made me reflect on the fact that God gives us free will, which results in us many wrong decisions - but that is the price of free will. This makes me think of Romans 8:28: And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. God makes good things happen out of the mess we make, when we seek Him.

Question: What actions did I do, as a result of seeing the film?

• I looked up Proverbs 21:30 and marked it in my Bible for future reference.

Question: Would I change anything about the film?

• Carla gave Dave a New Testament & Psalms book to take on his trip to NY- but the Bible is the OT and the NT. The Lord said we are not to add or take away from His book (Revelation 22:19)

• Dave commented about being faithful to his wife in marriage and remaining faithful , even after they split up. However, he had mentioned thinking about Mary every Jan 5th (their anniversary), through the years. This would have been while he was married. He also told Mary that he had never loved anyone the way he had loved her. So he hadn’t truly given his heart to his wife during their 19 years of marriage and had been unfaithful according to what Jesus says in Matthew 5:28.

• Dave said only meeting another person could really help a divorced person get over their divorce and he was convinced that God sent new partners into the lives of divorced people in order for them to heal. But Jesus said in John 14:16, And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you forever. Even the spirit of truth; whom the world cannot receive, because it seeth him not, neither knoweth him: but you know him; for he dwells with you, and shall be in you.” And in John 14:18, Jesus says, I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you. People can’t heal us - only God, through His Holy Spirit can do that.

• Recognition of the value of life and blessing in children

SUMMARY

Me & You, Us, forever, illustrates how regrets can lead us to sin, and invade the covenant of marriage. The film also illustrates how we can try to rationalize the selfish choices we make that blur the clear lines God has drawn through His rules.

Me & You, Us, forever shows why God made marriage with specific boundaries and the consequences we face when we do not do marriage God’s way: divorce, regret, anger, resentment, jealousy - the list goes on.

This film lifts up Christian counsel based on the Word of God, our only authority. It shows how having Bible-based Christians in our inner circles can hold us accountable to the Word we are supposed to, as Christians, hold near and dear. It shows how fragile Christians are, when we don’t focus on Jesus, through the Word, but also shows the power of God in using whomever He deems suitable, to return our focus to Jesus Christ.

Film site: www.christianmovies.com/ or you can check on your film streaming service of choice.

NB! The links I reference for my films is the source I used, but it is not an endorsement of the film streaming company. I am sure this particular film can be found on various digital streaming platforms.

Scripture References

Bitterness troubles us (Hebrews 12:15)

Thy will be done here on earth, as it is in heaven (Matthew 6:10)

There is no counsel against the Lord (Proverbs 21:30)

Faith is what pleases God (Hebrews 11:6)

Trust what God allows and doesn’t allow (Revelation 3:7)

Colossians 3:8 (in regards to watching what we say)

1 Peter 4:12-13 (fiery trials)

Proverbs 21:30 (this is no wisdom, understanding or counsel against the Lord)

Romans 8:28 (God works good out of our situations)

Revelation 22:19 (about adding or taking away from the Word of God)

Matthew 5:28 (adultery) NB! I say Matthew 5:8 in the podcast by mistake.

John 14:16 (Jesus prayed for God to send another Comforter, in His place)

John 14:18 (Jesus says He will leave us comfortless)

Source for film thumbnail

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Me_%26_You,_Us,_Forever